A scandal is brewing within the U.S. Navy. According to some people, for decades a man has been impersonating a naval officer. His name: Cap'n Crunch.
Yes, the lovable character that has graced our breakfast tables for 50 years appears to be nothing more than a liar. Some guy eating his bowl of the cereal staple recently noticed that the Captain only has three stripes on his uniform. Which makes him a Commander, not a Captain.
When contacted by the New York Daily News, Lt. Commander Chris Servello, Director of the U.S. Navy's Pentagon news desk said, "We have no Cap'n Crunch in the personnel records... and we checked."
Lt. Commander Servello went on to say, "We have notified NCIS (Naval Criminal Investigative Service) and we're looking into whether or not he's impersonating a naval officer — and that's a serious offense."
Though so far, Crunch, whose full name is Horatio Magellan Crunch, doesn't seem intimidated by a possible U.S. Navy court martial. A statement from Crunch on Twitter asserted that he is in fact a Captain: "Regarding today's rumors ... of course I'm a Cap'n! It's the Crunch — not the clothes — that make a man. #PaidMyDues," @RealCapnCrunch tweeted. He went on to say that since 1963 he's captained the S.S. Guppy with his crew, "which makes him an official Cap'n in any book!"
And Crunch isn't alone. Since news broke, he's had tons of supporters come forward (you can read some of them in the pictures posted to the right).
But is the Cap'n even an American? Some supporters are saying the reason the Navy can't find a history on Crunch, is because he is a Frenchman. He does wear a Napoleon-style hat. And in the French Navy, a Captain does wear three stripes.
If tried and convicted of impersonating a military officer, he could face six months in jail. Possibly extra time for the way his cereal he's been promoting for the past 50 years has cut up the roofs of millions of mouths across America.